Monday, April 02, 2007

Optimal Randomity

I cannot for the life of me remember when or where I first said that phrase - "optimal randomity" - which is bugging me right now like you would NOT believe. At any rate, it basically means "as random as we can get," which is just about what this post is. I don't do bullets often, but variety is the spice of life, n'est pas?
  • I was re-reading The Tempest recently, and there's a part where Prospero wants his daughter Miranda to go to sleep, so that he can make plans with Ariel in secret. So he basically says, "You're feeling very tired, your eyes are heavy," to which she responds, "Gee, you're right," and falls asleep. How many of you parents / childcare providers wish you had that power?
  • I saw a Pantene commercial the other day, and was reminded why I never ever use the stuff. Pantene sounds like panties way too much for me to ever put it on my head. BAD college memories there...
  • You know what amazes me about little kids? How they can just suck you into a conversation. This little one ran up to me the other day in Safeway and said, "You know what?" and I said, "What?" and then it was over for me. It's like before you know it, you're knee-deep in a conversation about their most recent Pokemon trading card acquisitions, and you have NO IDEA how you got there.
  • The other day in class, one of my students said something about a yeti. Unsure if other students knew what the word meant, I said, "And what's a yeti?" hoping the kid would quickly define it. He said, "A Canadian." The sad thing is that I have no idea if he was joking or not.
  • This stellar opening was recently found in one of my colleagues' student essays: "Discontent is the first step of action in many cases. War, politics, society, even home furnishing." Who knew?
  • I was so proud of myself a few days ago for covering a baking sheet in foil before using it. This way, I figured, I could just throw the aluminum foil away and not worry about washing the baking sheet. After using it, I threw the foil away and decided to let the sheet cool a bit before putting it away. When I returned to the kitchen a couple hours later, Nora was sleeping on it. By which I mean she was shedding on it. So much for not washing it.
  • Mixing lemonade and orange juice results in very sour orange juice. Don't try it.
  • Is it bad that I spend all week waiting for Thursday so that I can watch "Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader?" How come we're giving complete idiots hundreds of thousands of dollars every episode, but really intelligent people on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" and "Jeopardy!" get maybe ten or twenty thousand? And how do I get on the dumb show?
  • Five times in the last three days I've been sitting quietly in my room, lying in bed with my laptop, and one of the cats has bolted out from under my bed to meow at the closed door. What the- How do they get there when I'm not looking?
  • Other than one incomplete, I got straight A's last quarter! Can you believe it? I was just hoping to PASS - getting straight A's is like winning the lottery after a death row pardon. Woot!
  • Speaking of that incomplete, though, I'm so sick of schoolwork hanging over my head. Can I just be done already? Please? I am soooo counting down the days until June 17...
  • I love this blog. And all of you for hanging out to read it. And if I ever make it over 30 comments in a post, I have promised some of you to "do the happy dance like nobody's business." I even promised one of you that I would film it and post it on YouTube. :-P
Thus end the bullets. Come on, I know you have a comment to make. You can't tell me you don't have anything to say about ANY of those bullet points. Pantene, panties? Lemonade, orange juice? Yeti, Canadian? Straight A's? Nothing?

31 comments:

TSM Oregon said...

That girl is beautiful :) As are you!

Tell her I said that!

I was totally visualizing you in the grocery store being sucked into a conversation with a child like that. Hook, line, and Charmander.

Anonymous said...

"How many of you parents / childcare providers wish you had that power?": I think I'm going to try quoting THE TEMPEST at 'my' kids tomorrow to see if it really works. :)

Lady M said...

Straight A's - congratulations!

Anonymous said...

Don't forget to rinse and recycle the aluminum foil. The electricity required to purify a pound of aluminum from ore is (assuming I didn't make a mistake in the calculation - evidently Texas Instruments doesn't have bear paws in mind when designing calculator keys) approximately the same as required to power a large microwave on the "high" setting for six hours. Purifying recycled aluminum requires approximately 5% of that energy.

Domestic Slackstress said...

Happy dancing right along with you. I too love this blog. Keep it comin'.

Juka said...

Just wanted to say hi, and to remind you that I still do stop by. Loved the photo shoot :)

Anonymous said...

I want to see that dance!

BRING. IT. ON.

That is all.

Anonymous said...

Oh yeah. 23 comments to go.

Make that 22. :-D

shelleycoughlin said...

I want to make it over 30 posts too! Here's to adding one for you. :)

Anonymous said...

Doing my part for 30 comments. hee.
Congrats on the straight A's! That's awesome!

I like the little kid conversations that go...
them: and then, and then
me: eyes wide, nodding, thinking: "spit it out already kid!"

Love the new pic!
Also, I will email you later about that purse. short story that is not appropriate for work email. lol

Big Sis said...

I'd add a comment, but I really have nothing much to say, except that I'm happy to be here.

And that I can't recycle aluminum foil in my town. Or aluminum pie plates.

Anonymous said...

Woot! Straight As! Sweet.

Also, I forgot to mention in my photoshoot comment that you are welcome to photoshoot me =) I'm not photogenic by any means but you do wonders with a camera =)

Anonymous said...

Discontent is ALWAYS the first step in my home furnishing.

Anonymous said...

Jill: It's definitely worth making sure you're right about the aluminum foil recycling policy in your town. Clean foil is no harder to process than aluminum cans. Most recycling centers accept not just aluminum but also mixed metals, such as soup and sardine cans. The only tricky popular metal-containing product is aseptic containers, such as those for soy milk, that are a mix of paper, plastic, and - alas - aluminum.

Julie said...

Hey Lara-

This link will tell you all about the famous sign. Not a native Bostonian I had no idea.

http://www.redsoxconnection.com/citgo.html

Unknown said...

I am SO proud of you for your grades. rub some of that straight A fairy dust off on me, will you??

Teacher Anonymous said...

It's good to know that I'm not the only one who gets suckered into conversations with small children. I was walking through the parking lot of my apartment one day and wound up talking for maybe 10 minutes with this LITTLE little girl (maybe 4 at most) about her new bike. Her dad finally freed me. She was just so excited, I guess she needed to share with everyone.

Anonymous said...

Blech, The Tempest is my least favorite of Shakespeare's plays.

I've done my part... Now, let's see that dance.

Anonymous said...

Super congrats on the grades!!! Drinks are on me...

And I think all the kids of the world may just be bringing things full circle after the conversations you sucked adults into 20+ years ago. ;)

Major Bedhead said...

Straight As! Whoooo! Good for you.

Only ten more comments until you get to do the fandango.

Anonymous said...

Nine more after this one! Will you do your dance on 'Dancing With The Stars'?? I'll vote for you!

Home furnishing always come to mind when I'm discontented, but then again, so does landscaping.

Great post!!!

aMom2E said...

No fair! I was ready to comment after the childrens' stories suck you in bullet. Then I get to the end where you pander for comments and I felt like my comment would seem cheap or something!

haha I am just busting your chops!

I love that children can just suck you in. I still have the quality and it really gets me far in life! It got me box seats to the first Gator football game of the season! I look at it this way, I've never met a stranger, rather friends I have yet to meet (that one I learned from my grandma). I often find a quick way to end some conversations with children is to ask them what they learned in school today. The ones who are like I was will continue talking and tell you all about school (which I don't mind, but it doesn't end the conversation)... The ones who just aren't in to school will quickly clam up. Interesting.

And way to go on straight A's!!! That freaking ROCKS MY SOCKS OFF! Straight A's are something to be proud of in any semester, but in a semester filled with life and problems, that is an awesome accomplishment. My hat goes off to you!

Thanks again for your blog! It always makes me smile!

Bryan said...

I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks the same about Pantene!

And, oh man, I just saw Lady M's icon. It reminds me of your pumpkin...

I loved the randomness of the essay opening on home furnishing, cracked up at Jitta's picture, loved the description of the cats (of course), got jealous of your grades (just kidding; that's so awesome!), and am looking forward to viewing that video on Youtube! Just a few more comments needed...

Challenge 20/20 teams said...

24th!

I love talking to kids like that.

fourthbreakfast said...

Far be it for me to deny you the happy dance!

Anonymous said...

Mommy, I miss you.

And grandmommy too. I miss her strawberry pie. :(

Angela said...

I'm 27th. You're so close!

Lara said...

WOW... you guys came really close, i've gotta say.

TSM - i did, in fact, tell her. she hates me a little bit for posting that picture. :-P

jen - how did it work out for you? it's yet to work for me...

lady m - thank you! it was a lot of hard work getting there, and i was pleasantly surprised.

celia - thank you very much for the tip. i will remember to do so.

domestic slackstress - aw shucks. i love your blog, too, so we're on an even keel.

justin - YAY! i'm glad you still read.

lala and nancypearlwannabe - thanks for your assistance in the comment run. we were so close. :-P

aimee - yes, i definitely know those conversations, where you keep nodding and expecting an end, but it never comes. oh, and thanks for the email. :)

jill b - hey, i think that's a great comment to add. i'm glad you're here.

tali - yay for photoshoots. we must plan one soon. i think we should do a group shoot: you, jitta, and me. :)

bethiclaus - that's the thing: i TOTALLY get the point, and it's true. it just seemed... very random.

julie - thanks for the info! i'm glad to finally know. :)

sassy - i put some fairy dust in the mail for you. let me know when you get it.

teacher anonymous - sometimes, you just gotta share your news with the nearest person. you just happened to be that person.

tense teacher - really? of ALL the plays? even the boring histories? (not that all the histories are boring, but some of them definitely are.)

seeser - you know, that totally occurred to me. "hey, look! i learned not to talk to strangers!"

julia - i don't fandango, i only tango. ha! a rhyme!

r u serious? - i'm pretty sure i'm not enough of a star for the stars, but i'll do it here, in my apartment!

ffbgirl - i'm so glad my blog makes you smile. your comments do the same for me. and because of that, you can bust my chops any ol' time you want to. :)

bryan - oh my gosh, you should see that pumpkin now. it's AWFUL. quite frightening, really.

kara - and they seem to like talking to you... and whoever else will listen. :)

fourth breakfast - far be it for me to deny anyone a happy dance, but we're still a few comments shy...

kimmie - i miss you too, my sweet baby girl! and grandmommy is sad that you commented on me but not her. more pie will come soon, i'm sure.

angela - so close... and yet so far...

Seth said...

So yesterday I got suckered into a conversation about Garbage Pail Kids.... remember those? And then my boss got suckered into it... and within another minute or two, all of the other tutors at Sylvan were involved in the conversation too... There was no getting back on track after that.

Anonymous said...

OK. Guess I'll be #30.
Just linked from CL- thought I'd explore a bit!

Lara said...

seth - garbage pail kids were awesome! i could see how a conversation like that could totally pull everyone off track, no matter where you are. :)

betsy - glad you came by to explore! and congrats on being #30, too.

happy dance, here we come...