Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Prepare Thyself! (Or Don't, and Face the Consequences)

Back when I played Nanny Lara to my beloved Bubbers, I brought a change of clothes with me every single day, "just in case." At the time, he was still a baby, and a barfy baby at that. But my Bubs was partial to his dad when it came to regurgitation, so he always saved it up and spewed his milk or peas or carrots or bananas all over the paternal unit. Never once did I need my change of clothes.

These days, I work with older kids. In my new job, Older Child is almost five years old, and Younger Child is two and a half. Not only do I not have to bring an extra set of clothes with me, I actually wear normal clothes, as opposed to the sweatpants and old t-shirts I used to wear with Bubbers. I can wear sweaters, jeans, wide-leg trousers, button-down blouses - anything I want, really, and I like looking good, even if I am staying on the casual side of looking good. Today, for example, I wore medium-rinse jeans, an olive turtleneck sweater, and cream-colored sneakers, looking professional, but relaxed.

Nice jeans. Nice sweater. No change of clothes.

You see where this is going, don't you?

Yep, I got puked on. Quite a lot, actually. And what had he had for lunch before puking? A LOT of carrot juice. So I got puked on in a vibrant shade of orange.

And you know what? I still adore my job, even if lawyers probably don't have to clean partially-digested carrot juice out of their work clothes.

15 comments:

flutter said...

gah!!

brooke said...

Awesome... nothing like getting ralphed on when there's no way to remedy the clothing disaster.
I worked at a preschool for two years. I am 99% positive that just about every gross thing that comes out of a human body has been on me at some point.

Hanlie said...

When I was a nanny all those years ago the youngest child was 2 and got terribly car sick. We always traveled with a change of clothes for everyone. I can't tell you how many times I've changed my clothes by the side of some (mercifully!) deserted French country road. Ah, the joys!

Mrs. Chili said...

And THIS is why I don't teach little kids.

I've got a puke thing. I'm a sympathetic puker. No one pukes alone when I'm around. Nosiree!

I've been the first person at accident scenes (once where a woman died). Blood, gore, broken bones, stuff hanging off - I can do all that. Just don't puke...

Anonymous said...

Ah! The hazards if childcare!

Anonymous said...

Ahh isn't that fun. I spent Tuesday night being puked on by my own little angel. Puked on a lot. Your composure and acceptance of all things kids makes me jealous that you aren't my nanny and happy that you are someone's.

tmb said...

Ewww! You are one loving nanny :)

TSM Oregon said...

...and the preparation for motherhood begins.

The only difference is that at some point in early motherhood, you're too broke to replace the nice clothes that were just ruined by the carrot puke and so you start wearing the sweats again.

Sweats: $8.96 Jeans: $19.96. Hmmmmm....

Still, LOVE how much you love them babies!

Anonymous said...

I've been puked on and peed on so many times. But the worst was when I managed to get poo under my fingernails while dealing with an overzealous daughter.

Ali said...

you are a better woman that i. i couldn't handle getting puked on by another kid...i can't even handle it when it's my own kid!

Unknown said...

I imagine that you packed a change of clothes today...just a guess though.

Lisa said...

Funny, whenever I spend an extended amount of time with my nieces (4 and 2) I bring a change of clothes, or expect to need to change....

Lara said...

kaiser - poo under the fingernails i've definitely done before. i just made sure to wash my hands really, REALLY thoroughly afterwards.

tori - surprisingly, no, i didn't. but i didn't need them either. :)

Anonymous said...

Ewwwhhh....carrot juice...icky!

Hey, I was wondering if you want to partner up for the Blog Exchange this month. We have never partnered up before and this month we are choosing our own partners. What do you think? ;)

Guilty Secret said...

You reminded me of the day I got puked on by Golla... *Correction* Golla puked on me many, many times... I meant the worst time I got puked on by Golla...

I was tickling her, making her laugh, rocking her back and forth... then she projectile vomited all over me. GOAT'S MILK and banana.

Bleurgh! It's making me feel a little sick again now all these years later!