Sunday, October 21, 2007

Sunday Googleage - The Bedhead Edition

Posted by Major Bedhead at 5:58 PM
[Lara here. Bracketed text is added after the fact from me, courtesy of wireless internet at Burbank Airport. Many thanks to Major Bedhead for keeping the place warm for me!]

Hiya. Major Bedhead here. Lara's asked me to do Sunday Google-age for her (foolish, foolish woman) and I've promised not to break anything. I have, however, rifled her drawers and checked out her medicine cabinets and, well, frankly, except for that half-gallon of chocolate marshmallow that I polished off, there's not much to tell. She's got a shitload of dance stuff. And shoes. Boy, does this girl have shoes.

I am now going to try to do justice to Sunday Google-age. I'm not making any promises, though. I've spent the entire day with my mother and step-family. My toddlers had no naps. And the game is about to start. Bear with me. (Lara - Blogger's not letting me upload images, so you'll have to put the icon in later. And the font is totally fucked up. Told you I'd break something. *sigh*)

[Major Bedhead - Blogger can be needlessly cruel sometimes. I'll do my best to fix these problems.]



[Ha! I am awesome! Problems are gone!]

Projecting shame
- Are you asking how? Because I totally can hook you up with a sweet shame projector. They're practically giving them away down at Guilt Guys. High def, surround sound. Be the envy of your neighbours with this baby.

Self injury lips mouth - Listen, I don't know how many times you have to be told, but stop ironing your face.


my grandfathers were tall im short - Isn't genetics weird? Ask Mendel, he could tell you all kinds of stories.

make bigger boat - No, no, it's "We're gonna need a bigger boat."

australian accent tips - Oh, don't. It just sounds stupid. Stick with your own accent. Own it. Be proud of it. Imitating an Aussie is almost as awful as imitating an Englishman.

stop high-pitched screaming - If you find the answer to this one, let me know, because my ears are about to start bleeding over here.

"how to deal drugs" guide - Dave's not here, man.

mom laughable moments - The internet would run out of pixels if I detailed all of those.

iggy obituary - Iggy died? Oh, man, that sucks. Pssst. Who's Iggy? [GASP! Major Bedhead doesn't know who Iggy is?]

hukt definition - Don't spit up a hairball in here; Lara will kill you.

spanky's mom - Sorry, don't know her.

spanky's mom undressed - You, apparently, would like to though.

johnny wears pantyhose - Well, you know, that's ok. Some guys like that. Look at Eddie Izzard.

mommy + 139a - Y'know, I really suck at this new math. I give up; what's the answer?

crafts to do for crustaceans - If you can get crustaceans to do crafts, I think you might have a real money maker on your hands.

nobody gets the perfect life - Ain't that the truth?


OK, I'm hitting post now. I hope I don't blow up her blog.

9 comments:

Major Bedhead on 8:04 PM said...

Thanks, Lara!

spanky's mom said...

You nailed it, MB. (Except for the Iggy part.)

BetteJo on 9:48 PM said...

Love the google-age - and nothing LOOKS broken!! :)

Major Bedhead on 10:02 PM said...

I must have missed Iggy. I'm a post-Iggy person.

Lara on 10:24 PM said...

you know, i like having guests do the sunday google-age. i laughed out loud at multiple points, and i don't often do that with my own posts. thanks so much, MB! also, don't worry about the iggy issue. just be sad now that you know. :(

*sniffle*

Guilty Secret on 6:55 AM said...

Hi Major Bedhead!

I get so many hits from people looking up things like "how to deal drugs." I can't believe people think an online guide is the way to start a life of crime!

flutter on 12:42 PM said...

mmhmm, you still didn't get "rubber sheets belong in every couple's bed"

BUT YOU WILL NOW!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! :) love ya!

IMC Guy on 3:46 PM said...

I'd glad to be back in the blog world reading your stuff!

Wolf Lover Girl on 6:59 PM said...

I think you did a wonderful job, and just like with Lara's I laughed out loud!

~ Wolf Lover Girl

 

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