Saturday, August 01, 2009

If You're Looking for Inspiration, You've Come to the Right Place

Here's a conversation I had with myself today:

I: Self, I think we should get a new post up soon, yeah?

Myself: You're probably right.

I: So what should we write about?

Myself: Dood, I'm watching Batman. Can we talk later?

I: No, we really need to get a post up. Like, this afternoon.

Myself: Ugh, the screen just said, "Kapow!" and I missed what happened because I was listening to you whine about blog posting.

I: But we don't want to let down our readers, especially any new readers post-BlogHer!

Myself: Um, I hate to be the bucket-of-cold-water reality check here, but you spent BlogHer wandering around in beat-up flip flops with a pseudo-unibrow. I don't think you scored any new readers with that look.

I: You are such a bitch sometimes.

Myself: Eh, it's part of my charm.

So as you can see, that conversation got me nowhere closer to a substantive blog post, though I did enjoy a mini Batman marathon for a while. However, I still wanted to get a post up, so I turned to the ever-trusty Google and typed in "WRITING INSPIRATION" to see what would come up. (And I typed it in all caps like that so that Google would know I was very serious about wanting results.) Here's what I got:

31 Ways to Find Inspiration for Your Writing

I'm pretty sure this site was the product of a Baskin-Robbins outing. I can just imagine the two balding, middle-aged authors sitting together over an ice cream clown cake saying, "If only there were 31 flavors of writing tips..."

How to Squeeze Writing Inspiration from Every Experience

This just sounds... awkward. As for me, I have no interest in being the kind of person who sits wide-eyed at every dinner party and social outing, squeezing writing inspiration from the blood of my compatriots. If the inspiration needs to be squeezed out, it's not really inspiration anymore. It's... hard work, or something a lot like it.

20 Ways to Keep Your Writing Inspiration and Creativity High

I can't tell if this is going to give me 20 ways to keep a high level of writing inspiration and creativity, or 20 ways to stay high off of "writing inspiration and creativity," which is probably just a street name for some illicit drug or another. Either way, a 20-item list is too long for my attention span - I'm bored just thinking about it.

Imagination Prompt Generator: Random Writing Blog Prompts...

I imagine this being read aloud by the digitalized voice that used to start the Main Street Electrical Parade at Disneyland. (If you have no idea what I'm talking about, watch this video for about the first 30-40 seconds and you'll hear it.) Seriously, what the heck is an "Imagination Prompt Generator" anyway? Sounds like something from a bad sci-fi movie. Something involving a probe. A painful probe.

Inspiration - not motivation - for Writing.

Thanks for clearing up that very significant difference, but if I have to use Google to find my motivation for writing, said motivation probably doesn't exist.

Cure writer's block with writing prompts - writing tips character...

I've dealt with you fly-by-night snake-oil dealers before. None of your crazy cures for me!

Writing Inspiration

Well. Uh... okay. That's nice and straightforward. I'll take two please. One for now and one for later. Kthxbai.

Writing Inspiration

Wait a second... Two webpages with the same name? No fair! I call copycat on these guys. Or the other guys. 'Cause, you know, I don't know who came first.

Perspectives on Writing - Linda Jo Martin

Well that's not going to help me at all, because this blog is written by me, Lara David, not Linda Jo Martin. Her perspective is all well and good, but probably belongs on her own site, no? - Spiritual Writing: From Inspiration to Publication...

I think I could classify this blog in many ways, but "Spiritual Writing" is not one of them. This is probably not going to help much, unless I want to REALLY change my style.

Okay, I have to be honest here and admit that I did not click on a single one of those links, so, to be fair, they may have been more helpful than I gave them credit for. I'm a "judge a website by its cover" kind of girl, though, so I had pretty much made up my mind.

Plus I think there's another episode of Batman on soon...


AMomTwoBoys said...

Somehow I missed your unibrow. Dammit.

Google p0rn. That's sure to give you some bloggy inspiration.

Maybe. Not that I'd know.

BetteJo said...

What happened to your "google search" posts? I love them!

Lara said...

Bette Jo - Yeah, I've been thinking recently that I need to bring those back. Your prompting may be just the push I needed. :)

unmitigated me said...

I think you need to do an outfit post adapted for the summer. And had it been the Christian Bale Batman, I totally would have forgiven you for not posting, but TV Batman. Pfft.

P.S. Start being nicer to yourself, Ms. Cranky or I'm gonna fly to Cali and kick yer butt. On the other hand, I've never been there, maybe I should just come on out!

fjd said...

Heehee, funny post.

But, hey, why be so hard on yourself? I guess you're joking about the unibrow: I mean, hair doesn't grow that quickly (besides, you must have missed the memo that unibrows are now must-have fashion accessories; I'm cultivating mine now with some black-market Rogaine), but, really, do you honestly think anybody cares what exactly you wore? You were undoubtedly as cute as ever.

tpiglette said...

I agree that the Googleage should come back!

Major Bedhead said...

You so did not have a unibrow. My eyebrows, on the other hand, were more than scary. Also? My feet frightened small children and farm animals. And you still had dinner with me.

I need some inspiration, too. I have a few post ideas, but they won't gel.